Last week, I formally tendered my resignation to the board of a family-owned business. I just now got off a call with the board chairman to explain my decision.

 

The conversation was frustrating and for an hour later it continued to feel unfruitful.

 

During the conversation I fell into the trap of trying to justify myself to someone who had little interest in engaging or understanding why I was resigning. My reasoning made no sense to him.

 

In hindsight, it wasn’t a conversation — it was two parallel monologues. I was explaining my position; he was obfuscating, diverting to tangential issues.

 

There are no simple solutions to the challenges the company faces. I don’t pretend to have all the answers. But nothing the company faces is insurmountable.

 

However, until the board members find the courage to confront their differences — to endure the discomfort of disagreement and allow ideas to be tested against one another — no viable solutions will emerge.

 

In my experience, it’s the friction of differing opinions that polishes rough ideas into workable solutions.

 

But this board has a culture of conflict avoidance. The default behaviour is to play nice, sidestep uncomfortable truths, and defer difficult decisions — going along to get along.

 

Paradoxically, discussion was encouraged, but action was not. Silence was not a tool for listening; it was a way to withhold information and opinions.

 

I had become the fly in the ointment, expecting transparency and accountability — disrupting the unspoken rules of the boardroom.

 

Things came to a head when I discovered a few long-standing lawsuits against the company, cases that could materially affect its future and expose me to personal liability as a director. Yet, there was little appetite to acknowledge the facts or engage in a robust discussion about risks and strategies.

 

My instinct is always to seek solutions by gathering intelligence from discussion.

 

But sometimes, the solution is not borne from discussion.

 

The solution for me is to risk my relationships with board members and resign. I am not creating value as a board member. I am exposing myself to liability.

 

Resigning is the solution.

 

Not the polished stone borne of friction and debate, but the realisation that the debate will not happen.